Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Shitty Things Happen to Good People...

We all know this to be true, right? A fact of life I suppose but shitty nonetheless.

This week is the bearer of sad news for two couples, members of our online surrogacy forum and reminds us how touch and go this journey is for all of us. One couple almost out of their first trimester got the sad news that their little one slipped away the other night. Not destined to be a part of their lives.

The second couple were 15 weeks from having their baby and he came into our world early - 15 weeks is not too early I thought but he did not make it. I'm shocked and devastated by this news too.

This has been on my mind ever since I found out. I am trying to stay positive and keep telling myself that we'll be different and have no issues but the truth is...we might. We must stay positive though right?

I have spent the best part of today online consulting Dr Google in his infinite wisdom. I've had a doozy today let me tell you & my head is spinning!
Everything from the quality of eggs from our planned ED given her age to transfering 2/3 day old embies vs paying extra til they reach the blast stage.......

My down time seems to come when I'm asleep and can't think of every possible

what if scenario.

Because we can't control what is going to happen to Darren and I in our endeavour to bring Noddy into our world, a guardian angel to look out for all of us.

I pray that God brings him/her to us.


  1. Dear Johnny and Darren,

    I give you permission to be positive and I forbid you to spend any more time with Dr Google. he is a really scary pretend friend!

    There is absolutely no reason you will not have success on the first go, and if not then, success with a subsequent FET.

    The vast majority of people have success in the first couple of tries. What happened with us was something quite extraordinary, and not something you will face. We just happened to choose an ED who may have fertility issues of her own, and hence we have no frozen embies for a second try. We were lucky to get as far as we did. (Of course it could have been DH's sperm, who knows?)

    This is most unlikely this will happen to you guys. So, for my sake, if you can do anything for me right now, show me another positive Aussie success story and keep that flag flying for us all!!!

    M x

  2. thankyou so much for thinking of us, it is so amazing that even though we dont know each other our lives seem linked somehow to this incredible journey of surrogacy.
    never in my life did i think there would be so many people thinking of us in our grief.
    just like amani said, our situation was also VERY unusual and very unfortunate, i know its difficult sometimes when things dont go right but you have to remember that MOST of the time things go right so you should focus on that.
    its such a long difficult journey for some of us to have children , but if you keep fighting you will get there in the end, i really believe that.
    this isnt the last youve seen of me!
    good luck and be strong
    love sarahxx

  3. step away from, as hard as it is you will drive yourself nuts.

    it is hard waiting and being able to imagine every horrifying possibility. i wish i could tell you that it goes away, but that has not been my experience.

    i do not know your whole situation. i do know that driving yourself nuts will not help the process along. it is a long road, but one day (i hope) it will be worth it for all of us.